TRYING TO GET A LEG UP ON THE COMPETITION
I know I've been away from my Blog for awhile.. however, after you read the following, maybe you'll know why I have been busy... I have had my HANDS full with my FEET!
I am a Pisces. Pisces are known to have problems with their feet. To say I have problems with my feet is an understatement. I was born with completely flat feet. Not just a WEAK arch.... but with NO ARCH. My father had the same deformity. Due to this problem, years of walking on my feet improperly has put immense strain on my feet, ankles, legs and back. Getting older does not help! And no, regular arch supports do not really help, as arch supports are designed to support an arch! But when you have NO arch, like myself, arch supports just feel as if you are walking with a rock in your shoe!
Due to this deformity, pounding the pavement to an excessive amount at the last pathetic job I had, and alas getting older, I am now the un-proud owner of severe bunions and heel spurs on both feet. I was going to go ahead with surgery for the bunions and spurs until my insurance ran out. I limp everywhere I go lately and it's painful. Then to add injury to insult, 2 weeks ago I sustained a serious and painful injury to my right foot. How did I get that injury, you ask? Typical of my luck and klutz that I am, I fell into a pothole while stepping off the curb getting into a cab! And why did I have to get a cab? BECAUSE MY FEET HURT AND I COULDN'T WALK ANOTHER STEP!! Round and round we go.....!
Trying to figure out a solution to all this and having no health insurance, I decided to take myself out to San Francisco General Hospital which lets us less fortunate patients pay on a sliding scale. So while illegal immigrants continue to find work in this country and get help with medical bills, etc, I, a 100% American-born citizen, have to struggle for employment, health care and society's help. Don't even get me started! Maybe I should start singing the National Anthem in Spanish if I expect help from my own country!! In any case, I eagerly looked forward to my first appointment with the hope that I might get some relief for my pathetic foot problems as well as obtain an extension for my temporary Handicap Placard for my car.
After a fairly lengthy rigamarole to register and sign up, yada yada, I meet my assigned doctor at SF General Hospital. Upon handing her the filled-out form for a temporary Handicap Placard, Dr. Snotface started lecturing me saying that they just don't hand out Parking Placards to 'just anyone'! Says you have to be an amputee for that !!! What an absolute raving idiot and what a load of crap!! Tried to explain to her that I already had a temporary one from when I was diagnosed with the heel spurs, and now needed to extend it. However, it did no good. On top of her apparent meanness and insanity, she was incredibly insensitive and even read my X-rays wrong, not even recognizing the very visible heel spurs on the X-Rays. She was in her 30's or so, and I am convinced that she doesn't know diddly what heel spurs are or just how incredibly painful they can be! Her remedy? She wanted to send me to REHAB for my feet!! Geez!!! You don't rehab bunions or heel spurs away!! Those things are only solved with surgery!! I kept thinking, "what looney trade school did they send this one to???!!" Just wait til she's older and has some disabilities! The bitch. I have since requested another doctor.
Then on top of that, this incompetent nincompoop of a doctor didn't fill in my paperwork correctly for a blood test. After my visit with her, she had me traipse all the way from her office to the Clinic about 3 blocks away, which is no MEAN FEAT when you are on your LAST LEG, and then I was told by this girl at Window #5 that they couldn't do the blood test as the doctor did not put the correct stamp on the paperwork!!! I broke out in a hissy-fit right there and then! I DEMANDED that they call & verify with the doctor that I was to supposed to take this test, and was in no shape to walk all the way back to the doctor's office limping with a cane!! To make matters even worse, I am using this old wooden cane my mother had in her garage which is painted WHITE, so now I look BLIND as well as LAME!!! Finally, Ms. Bureaucrat acquiesed and shooed me on over to get the blood test. Here I was originally coming to SF General for my feet problems, and I ended up having a blood test and an ECG test for my heart, - but NOTHING was done for my feet!! ACHHHHH!!!
Then, just this past week I got an ingrown toenail on my left big toe. Tried to treat it myself one night and made it worse. Anyway, I suffered all night that night with intense pain and throbbing, to the point where just a light brushing of the bedsheet made me feel as if the Spanish Inquisition was pulling my toenail out with a pair of hot irons! Long story short, decided all of this warranted a visit with my REAL foot doctor so he could check the sprain & other foot problems and I could hopefully get some real help. I feared what the bill would be for a visit, but I just had to get some real help. (According to the X-rays, I now have heel spurs on both feet!).
I was very anxious to tell the Podiatrist about the bad sprain or whatever it is on my right foot in the arch area and how painful that was. Anyway, Dr. Flatfoot almost totally ignored my sprained foot problem and went right for the ingrown toenail, licking his lips as if to sadistically savor what he knew was to come! When he took the bandage off, his voice went up one octave as he exclaimed, "OMIGOD!!! IT'S REALLY BADLY INFECTED!!".. He then tells me to prepare for 'some' pain... and then proceeds to lance it and cauterize it! Well, just having that toe touched made me wince in excruciating pain, but having him LANCE AND CAUTERIZE it, was pain way beyond what I've ever felt before in my life - even worse than when I broke my ankle!!! I TRULY THOUGHT I WAS IN A TORTURE CHAMBER!! I was screaming and crying for what seemed like an eternity, it was so bad!! Dr. Feelgood had to peel off the infected skin (like a burn patient), and I almost came out of my chair! I squeezed the arms of the chair I was in so hard, that there are now probably permanent indentation marks on them! He then informed me that my toe is gonna turn a bit BLACK because of the silver nitrate he put on it! Oh great! Gangrene?! Anyway, now I have THAT problem on top of the 2 heel spurs, sprained right foot, very sore bunions, and a bad knee! I can't kneel without pain, and getting up is a real trick. No matter what foot I try to push myself up with, I have pain and difficulty. Just doing household chores is downright difficult if not impossible. If this doesn't qualify me for going on Disability, I don't know what does!
Anyway, the podiatrist office visit was $95 which he cut down from $175 feeling sorry for me! I proceeded to write a check and the nurse says "NO CHECKS"! Well, had no credit card that had enough available funds, so I said that I could give her my mother's credit card # which would go thru. "NO WE CAN'T DO THAT - HAVE TO HAVE ACTUAL CARD TO SWIPE"! In the meantime, I had given the doctor my paperwork for him to sign for my temporary Handicap Placard for the car and the paperwork for applying for Disability. He was in the process of signing it, until he realized I couldn't FOOT THE BILL that day! So he hands the papers back to me all wadded up, and says he can't do THAT until I pay. OY VEY! I am desperate and have GOT to get on this Disability soon to have some money coming in! Was going to go back Friday to take care of the bill, but the doctor was out all day in surgery, so now have to go back Monday and hope to God he will still sign all the paperwork and not say that I am not disabled enough to qualify!
Remember that old 50's song by Dinah Shore, "Buttons and Bows"? Well, here's an updated version which is now my theme song......
BUNIONS AND SPURS
East is east and west is west
And it seems like I’ve been cursed!
Let's go where I'll keep on wearin' those
Bandages and canes and Bunions and Spurs,
Rings and things and Bunions and Spurs!
Don't bury me in this left wing city!
Take me where they’ll treat a real Amer-I-Can –
Let's go somewhere where they’ll have some pity
And they love a gal who's not from Afghanistan!
And I'll stand out in Bunions and Spurs!
Let's vamoose where gals keep usin' those walkers and crutches
And fallen arches that can’t be worse -
And I'm all yours in Bunions and Spurs!
Gimme my Handicap sign where I can park just fine
Somewhere where doctors are doctors and nurses are nurses
And the smell of Deep Heet that help the Feet
And I'm all yours in Bunions and Spurs!
I am a Pisces. Pisces are known to have problems with their feet. To say I have problems with my feet is an understatement. I was born with completely flat feet. Not just a WEAK arch.... but with NO ARCH. My father had the same deformity. Due to this problem, years of walking on my feet improperly has put immense strain on my feet, ankles, legs and back. Getting older does not help! And no, regular arch supports do not really help, as arch supports are designed to support an arch! But when you have NO arch, like myself, arch supports just feel as if you are walking with a rock in your shoe!
Due to this deformity, pounding the pavement to an excessive amount at the last pathetic job I had, and alas getting older, I am now the un-proud owner of severe bunions and heel spurs on both feet. I was going to go ahead with surgery for the bunions and spurs until my insurance ran out. I limp everywhere I go lately and it's painful. Then to add injury to insult, 2 weeks ago I sustained a serious and painful injury to my right foot. How did I get that injury, you ask? Typical of my luck and klutz that I am, I fell into a pothole while stepping off the curb getting into a cab! And why did I have to get a cab? BECAUSE MY FEET HURT AND I COULDN'T WALK ANOTHER STEP!! Round and round we go.....!
Trying to figure out a solution to all this and having no health insurance, I decided to take myself out to San Francisco General Hospital which lets us less fortunate patients pay on a sliding scale. So while illegal immigrants continue to find work in this country and get help with medical bills, etc, I, a 100% American-born citizen, have to struggle for employment, health care and society's help. Don't even get me started! Maybe I should start singing the National Anthem in Spanish if I expect help from my own country!! In any case, I eagerly looked forward to my first appointment with the hope that I might get some relief for my pathetic foot problems as well as obtain an extension for my temporary Handicap Placard for my car.
After a fairly lengthy rigamarole to register and sign up, yada yada, I meet my assigned doctor at SF General Hospital. Upon handing her the filled-out form for a temporary Handicap Placard, Dr. Snotface started lecturing me saying that they just don't hand out Parking Placards to 'just anyone'! Says you have to be an amputee for that !!! What an absolute raving idiot and what a load of crap!! Tried to explain to her that I already had a temporary one from when I was diagnosed with the heel spurs, and now needed to extend it. However, it did no good. On top of her apparent meanness and insanity, she was incredibly insensitive and even read my X-rays wrong, not even recognizing the very visible heel spurs on the X-Rays. She was in her 30's or so, and I am convinced that she doesn't know diddly what heel spurs are or just how incredibly painful they can be! Her remedy? She wanted to send me to REHAB for my feet!! Geez!!! You don't rehab bunions or heel spurs away!! Those things are only solved with surgery!! I kept thinking, "what looney trade school did they send this one to???!!" Just wait til she's older and has some disabilities! The bitch. I have since requested another doctor.
Then on top of that, this incompetent nincompoop of a doctor didn't fill in my paperwork correctly for a blood test. After my visit with her, she had me traipse all the way from her office to the Clinic about 3 blocks away, which is no MEAN FEAT when you are on your LAST LEG, and then I was told by this girl at Window #5 that they couldn't do the blood test as the doctor did not put the correct stamp on the paperwork!!! I broke out in a hissy-fit right there and then! I DEMANDED that they call & verify with the doctor that I was to supposed to take this test, and was in no shape to walk all the way back to the doctor's office limping with a cane!! To make matters even worse, I am using this old wooden cane my mother had in her garage which is painted WHITE, so now I look BLIND as well as LAME!!! Finally, Ms. Bureaucrat acquiesed and shooed me on over to get the blood test. Here I was originally coming to SF General for my feet problems, and I ended up having a blood test and an ECG test for my heart, - but NOTHING was done for my feet!! ACHHHHH!!!
Then, just this past week I got an ingrown toenail on my left big toe. Tried to treat it myself one night and made it worse. Anyway, I suffered all night that night with intense pain and throbbing, to the point where just a light brushing of the bedsheet made me feel as if the Spanish Inquisition was pulling my toenail out with a pair of hot irons! Long story short, decided all of this warranted a visit with my REAL foot doctor so he could check the sprain & other foot problems and I could hopefully get some real help. I feared what the bill would be for a visit, but I just had to get some real help. (According to the X-rays, I now have heel spurs on both feet!).
I was very anxious to tell the Podiatrist about the bad sprain or whatever it is on my right foot in the arch area and how painful that was. Anyway, Dr. Flatfoot almost totally ignored my sprained foot problem and went right for the ingrown toenail, licking his lips as if to sadistically savor what he knew was to come! When he took the bandage off, his voice went up one octave as he exclaimed, "OMIGOD!!! IT'S REALLY BADLY INFECTED!!".. He then tells me to prepare for 'some' pain... and then proceeds to lance it and cauterize it! Well, just having that toe touched made me wince in excruciating pain, but having him LANCE AND CAUTERIZE it, was pain way beyond what I've ever felt before in my life - even worse than when I broke my ankle!!! I TRULY THOUGHT I WAS IN A TORTURE CHAMBER!! I was screaming and crying for what seemed like an eternity, it was so bad!! Dr. Feelgood had to peel off the infected skin (like a burn patient), and I almost came out of my chair! I squeezed the arms of the chair I was in so hard, that there are now probably permanent indentation marks on them! He then informed me that my toe is gonna turn a bit BLACK because of the silver nitrate he put on it! Oh great! Gangrene?! Anyway, now I have THAT problem on top of the 2 heel spurs, sprained right foot, very sore bunions, and a bad knee! I can't kneel without pain, and getting up is a real trick. No matter what foot I try to push myself up with, I have pain and difficulty. Just doing household chores is downright difficult if not impossible. If this doesn't qualify me for going on Disability, I don't know what does!
Anyway, the podiatrist office visit was $95 which he cut down from $175 feeling sorry for me! I proceeded to write a check and the nurse says "NO CHECKS"! Well, had no credit card that had enough available funds, so I said that I could give her my mother's credit card # which would go thru. "NO WE CAN'T DO THAT - HAVE TO HAVE ACTUAL CARD TO SWIPE"! In the meantime, I had given the doctor my paperwork for him to sign for my temporary Handicap Placard for the car and the paperwork for applying for Disability. He was in the process of signing it, until he realized I couldn't FOOT THE BILL that day! So he hands the papers back to me all wadded up, and says he can't do THAT until I pay. OY VEY! I am desperate and have GOT to get on this Disability soon to have some money coming in! Was going to go back Friday to take care of the bill, but the doctor was out all day in surgery, so now have to go back Monday and hope to God he will still sign all the paperwork and not say that I am not disabled enough to qualify!
Remember that old 50's song by Dinah Shore, "Buttons and Bows"? Well, here's an updated version which is now my theme song......
BUNIONS AND SPURS
East is east and west is west
And it seems like I’ve been cursed!
Let's go where I'll keep on wearin' those
Bandages and canes and Bunions and Spurs,
Rings and things and Bunions and Spurs!
Don't bury me in this left wing city!
Take me where they’ll treat a real Amer-I-Can –
Let's go somewhere where they’ll have some pity
And they love a gal who's not from Afghanistan!
And I'll stand out in Bunions and Spurs!
Let's vamoose where gals keep usin' those walkers and crutches
And fallen arches that can’t be worse -
And I'm all yours in Bunions and Spurs!
Gimme my Handicap sign where I can park just fine
Somewhere where doctors are doctors and nurses are nurses
And the smell of Deep Heet that help the Feet
And I'm all yours in Bunions and Spurs!
You've heard of Farewell to Arms? Well, this is Farewell to Feet and has left me feeling as de-FEETed as a Lame Duck!
posted by LADYGOLD at 6:15 PM
